Why I dispise nature

Some clever clogs started a stink trick whereby he (white, male, corporate I'm guessing) equated "NATURAL" with the romantic ideas of the old. You know - good health, peaceful dew drops, clear skies, a picturesque village with ubiquitous chattering and giggling of children, the biggest lentil plants you've ever seen...





This was clever because now he could market all sorts of shit with the adjective: NATURAL and wonderous feelings would glow from the consumer. Not just veges, but stereos ("Kenwood, Naturally"), and they sky was the limit as far as what NATURAL would market.



And its tempting to say its all good. Getting simple on it. making your own beer, organic gardens, getting out of the city.... ahhhh...



But actually NATURE is full of shit. NATURE means lying on a dirt floor, can't sleep cause of the flea's (yeah like garlic really gets rid of those), festering wounds (yeah like garlic really gets rid of those), poxed, rabid, freezing cold, headachy, isolated, nackered from fricking hard work, predated, hungry from crop failure....

NATURE means death for 30% of babies,



Here's the clincher:

NATURE is where the only music is what comes out of your own mouth

(AAARRHHHSSSSGGGRRRRTTTTAAATTTAAA!!!)



NATURE is red in tooth and claw (Tennyson I believe)



ok enough of that.

Why then is it a GOOD thing that preservative-free dog food is NATURAL????